ADHD at School: The best classroom for my son!

I was teaching at the same elementary school that my son was attending. Due to ADHD, he was struggling in the classroom, on the playground, in the cafeteria - pretty much anywhere he went. I was teaching special education, so I spent the majority of my time in my classroom with "my" kids...aka: I didn't get out much.

The school was three stories with grades K-1 on the first story, grades 2-4 on the second story, and 5th grades on the third. Well, one afternoon, I was walking down the hallway of the 2nd story and passed by a classroom. I glanced in to see a small classroom of kids. The classroom was noisier than others. Something about it made me turn around and go back for another look.

I stood a few feet from the door, watching. The kids were all at a long table, rather than desks. They sat on stools instead of chairs. Some were standing. It looked pretty laid back. Students were working together on a project; some looking in microscopes, others using colored cubes to make designs of some sort, and still others were writing on poster board. They were all engaged in whatever it was they were doing. They were talking, sometimes loudly. I stepped to the side a bit, to try to see just who the teacher was. I hadn't seen him before. He had on blue jeans, an untucked dress shirt and a bow tie. His hair was spiked down the middle. He wasn't lecturing from the front of the room; in fact I wasn't sure where the front was. He was simply circulating. He patted kids on the back, gave high-5's.

It was wonderful. I looked at the room number, and made a mental note to ask the principal about it.

That classroom was just what Caleb needed. it looked like every kid in there was free to learn at their own pace. Every learning style was addressed, not just the usual school norm of addressing only auditory learners. Caleb was a hands-on learner. He needed to touch, feel, manipulate things to learn. He needed to be able to move about and talk about his process.

I was so excited about this classroom. The kids looked a bit older than Caleb, so I hoped I hadn't missed the opportunity to request Caleb be in that room. Later that day, I carved out a few minutes and went into the principals office.

I described the classroom but she seemed to have no idea who I was talking about. Finally, I said, "Room 2-D?"

"Ooooh..." she said. "That's the gifted classroom."

Ironically, the classroom that looked perfect for my child was created for the smartest of the smart.

I've never forgotten that. Why? Because our school system was failing my child terribly. Because a solution was right there in his own school. And because my child would never have the opportunity to benefit from such a classroom. No, my child would continue his education,  in classrooms for children who learned best by being lectured at. What a travesty. What a disappointment. And shame on the schools for seeing a gifted child as one who benefits from such a structure, but never addressing who else it might benefit.

I am convinced that had my son been allowed to be in such a classroom, his educational experience would have been much different - much BETTER in fact, than the education he received. Has anything changed since then?

I doubt it.

If you could design a classroom for your child, what would it look like?

Still Running in Circles, Karen

ADHD: School Meetings

photo credit: careerworks.biz

Parent-teacher conferences can make a grown Mama shake in her boots - especially a Mama with a kiddo with ADHD. Conferences for our kids always seem to take on a negative tone. Look at the photo above; Imagine yourself, walking in and sitting down at that table. Quick...how do you feel?

That bad, huh?

Well, I've got the solution. I've sat on both sides of that little table; the one where your only choice is to sit in a tiny chair with your...ample-ness hanging over both sides. The thing about those meetings is this; teachers are prepared. You know what that means? It means you have to be prepared too.

Your child's teacher(s)will have an agenda and a pile of papers to show you. Those papers might include a report card, assessments in different subjects, tests he has taken, samples of his daily work, his progress on IEP goals or 504 Plan, reports from specials like music, P.E., and library.

Educational staff might include; the classroom teacher, special education teacher, school psychologist, school counselor, P.E. teacher, music teacher, principal, or instructional assistant. Each person has your child's best interest in mind. Each one has an agenda; to let you know how your child is doing in school.

Conferences are infuriatingly short, some as short as 5 minutes, others as long as 10. It's just not enough time. And just sitting down with these professionals can be so intimidating that you end up saying nothing at all.

Here are a few tips that can help you regain some control;

1. Make a list of questions or comments and bring them with you.
2. Talk to the teacher ahead of time and let her know that you will need a few minutes to speak.
3. If you need more than a few minutes, ask if the conference time can be changed or even moved to an after school slot the following week.
4. Bring your won pile of papers; you may not need them all, but it's good to be prepared. Items might include doctor's reports and anecdotal notes you've taken at home.
5. Be respectful. If you disagree with something, give your based-on-fact opinion, but don't get into an argument.
6. Teachers are busy - but remember, conferences should be a conversation, not a lecture. So try to keep the dialog conversational. End by asking what you can do to help Johnny do even better at school.
7. Share stories of success, if you've seen good things in your child. Everyone wants to feel like what they're doing is making a difference.
8. If you're not satisfied that all your questions were answered or that you had ample time to share your concerns, ask for another meeting. It's perfectly within your rights as a parent to do so.

I can tell you from a teacher's perspective that parents who did these things at conferences had my utmost respect. I felt like they were part of the team of people who were working together in the best interest of their child, my student.

Have you ever done something like this at parent-teacher conferences? How did it turn out? Have you ever felt intimidated by the educational process? ~Karen